So I've come to the realization that I have lived and currently live most of my life looking forward to the future. As a little girl I couldn't wait to get married and have kids. Once I was married I loved it because I love him, and then I couldn't wait to have kids. Now that I have kids I keep looking forward to the things they'll do when they're a little bit older (i.e. sleep in, do chores, a better amount of two way communication, etc.) Well I've come to realize thinking that way and looking forward to what are great things, means I'm not always appreciating what's happening right now. So I've been praying for an attitude of gratefulness and contentment in enjoying what's currently happening. I don't expect every second of every day to feel like this, I am definitely looking forward to when Silas has all his teeth, nothing wrong with that. But I am trying to recognize the small things that happen now that will not happen in the future that I absolutely cherish.
Which gets us to some of the sweetest seconds of my day. During most meals, where I pretty much feed the boys b/c Tommy no longer wants to feed himself since Silas is still being fed by mom, I mean how is that fair? What is he three years old or something ;) ? Anyway meal times usually go one of two ways - extremely smooth with two fantastic eaters, or pretty rough where I can't wait for them to be done and mommy then needs a little space. Sometimes a lot of encouragement, high fives, cheering, dancing, singing helps. Well along the way Tommy and I have started a tradition. He'll give me a couple of fives and then he lets me hold his hand for a few seconds. Those are some of the sweetest seconds of my day. I know he wants to be holding my hand b/c he has no problem taking it away when he's finished. I love to hold his sweet tiny hand in mine. It seriously feels like the world is standing still for just a second while my baby boy lets me love on him.
The other thing about Tommy is his increasing enjoyment of me making silly faces. This has been growing for a long time now but I LOVE IT! I love to make him laugh and to be able to do that by just making a stupid/goofy/frozen face - it's pretty fantastic. And I love that it's something we can see the connection in his mind - he knows I'm being silly and he loves it. A goofy face with tickling = a great belly laugh from Tom!
Silas baby is just growing into a little boy! He started dancing this past week - just like his big brother dances! By spinning in circles! It is so cute! We always figured that he would follow in Tommy's dancing footsteps but we didn't know it would happen so soon. Silas has some mad walking skills. However this week has been pretty funny b/c he's been walking around like somebody slipped him some alcohol. We're thinking he might have some fluid in his ears, Benadryl seems to be helping with his tipsy walk, hopefully it doesn't lead to an ear infection. Silas has also grown extremely fond of Maggie and Maggie loves him the most of all us now, b/c he pays her the most attention. He walks up to her all the time and pats her and says "dog". He loves when she wags her tail and he's standing behind her and it's hitting him in the face. Haha! She is part Husky so her tail is fluffy and fans and tickles his face. We've also been noticing that Silas' personality is very much like his daddy - I am his favorite person ;) (humble I know but I'm really just stating a fact) and he is definitely a homebody. When he is in a crowd the boy clams up and looks very serious. Kyle doesn't do that but he loves to be home and he is always exhausted after a social event. I remember one of the things I loved about Kyle when we were dating was that he was quiet a lot around other people but he always talked a lot to me, and to this day it makes me feel very special to know he is so comfortable around me, I kind of like being his favorite person b/c he's mine too.
In other Kyle news we were finally able to go on a date! And I realized why we don't go on more. Planning the logistics of a date is stressful to me. Any other mamas feel that way? Kyle thinks it's cake and doesn't understand why it stresses me out but that's probably b/c I have to think through the logistics more than him. We saw a movie, had dinner, did a quick shopping trip, and got milkshakes. It was really nice to have some uninterrupted time with him and is worth stressful planning. It's crazy to think back to a time before Tommy and Silas and how easy it was to go on a date - that was a wonderful time too but I am always thankful to come back to my sweet baby boys, they make my life feel so much more meaningful! So whatever stage of life you are in, single, married, without kids, with kids - there are perks to all of them - don't take them for granted and enjoy some sweet seconds in your day!
like yo attitude, giiiirl :)
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