And then there were three!

So obviously having three kids has made me extremely busy and unable to blog.  As I write this I have a load of wet clothes in the washing machine that have been there since nap time, a clothes basket full of clean clothes to fold, many stacks of dirty laundry around the house, a messy kitchen, a family room with toys literally all over the place, and I'm bouncy my baby girl in her bouncy seat with my foot so she will go to bed.  But I am forcing myself to sit down and type this before I forget everything about her sweet birth!  I am already forgetting details! Aaaah! Crazy mom!

So Ella is a pretty cool girl, she decided to start her arrival on a MONDAY! Making this technically a Mushy Monday post, just about almost 4 months over due!  So Monday, September 9th, 2013, was a very pregnant day like the many others before it.  My mom was off of work and came over at lunch to watch the boys so Kyle and I could go on one last date, out to eat, to my favorite restaurant - O'Charley's.  The food was amazing - I got a Caesar Salad and half a BLT with french fries, and a cherry coke, with lots of refills (more than I probably should of since I was pregnant).  It was seriously a gloriously delicious lunch! I love food and it made me extremely happy to have that time with my hubby, to have good service and good food, it made my heart happy!  So we had fun at our date and came back to hang out with my mom for a bit.  Then I put the boys down for the nap, etc. etc. nothing new.  Mom went home only to return later that night.  It was about 8:40 PM to be exact that I noticed my first contraction.  I was putting Silas to bed, and on my way back popped my head in Kyle's office where he was playing a computer game with his friends, and just said, "Hey you may want to hold off on telling them you can work tomorrow, I'm having some weird cramps.  They may be contractions, but they may go away."  He shrugged me off and said I had told him I'd had contractions a hundred times and it was nothing, but I told him they were different this time.  I went back out to the couch where Tom was playing on the IPad.  We snuggled while he played and I soon realized they were contractions b/c there was a definite rhythm, but I didn't time them b/c they had just started.  I just rested on the couch with Tom until it was past his bed time b/c I didn't feel like getting up, I wasn't in a lot of pain just tired.  So at about 9:30ish I texted Kyle and let him know they were real contractions.  I put Tommy to bed around 9:40 and started timing my contractions.  They were about 4 minutes apart.  Thinking that was weird b/c I hadn't been having them that long I just kept timing them, and they just kept getting closer together.  I decided to get our stuff together and popped my head back in Kyle's office to let him know that should be his last game for the night b/c the contractions were pretty close together.  He got off the computer and said, so how close are they, and I said well about 3 minutes apart, sometimes 2.  He was a little shocked and told me to call our parents and let them know and to have my parents come stay with the boys.  We started changing the sheet on our bed since his parents would be staying at our house and Kyle was timing my contractions, they were now 1-2 minutes apart.  Kyle insisted I go lay on the couch and stop moving to try and slow my labor down.  I explained I could still talk through them it wasn't anything to be worried about but he was most concerned if I kept doing stuff we wouldn't make it to the hospital in time.

My parents arrived, my dad stayed with the sleeping boys, and my mom went to the hospital with us, and Kyle's mom was on her way from Bowling Green.  We got checked in a little before midnight, I was still having regular contractions every 2-3 minutes and I could breath through them fine.  You could tell they didn't think I was in labor at the hospital but were shocked to find me at 5 cm when I arrived.  We got all set up in the room, and shortly after they offered me an epidural - I felt torn b/c I didn't really want one yet but it was my one sure fire opportunity to get one and Kyle encouraged it, so I got it.  In hindsight I wish I would have waited, it was more uncomfortable getting an epidural when I wasn't in constant pain (like I was when I got them with the boys from the Pitocin), and I loved laboring naturally it was a breeze compared to Pitocin induced labor.  I really enjoyed getting to feel real contractions, may sound weird, but the contractions with the boys were induced and insufferable.  The epidural slowed my labor so then they gave me Pitocin.  They tried to break my water but couldn't b/c Ella's head was in the way.  I progressed quickly.  At 5:18 AM on September 10th, sweet Ella entered this world with one push!  She was 8lbs 4.7oz and 20 inches long.  Precious girl was beautiful, had the longest fingers I've ever seen on a baby, and was a champion nurser from day one.  Having a baby after staying up all night was somewhat disorienting and I had a pretty decent headache from the lack of sleep.  My mom and Kyle's mom left shortly after only to arrive at our house as the boys were waking up!  They, as well as Pap Pap, took the best care of our kiddos!

In the past my recoveries from having my babies has been extremely smooth and quick, such a blessing!  I never took any heavy pain medicine after having the boys, only Ibuprofen, I was up and walking around a couple of hours after they were born.  This was not the same with Ella.  It seemed to take longer for my epidural to wear off, I was clearly exhausted from lack of sleep, but then later that evening on the 10th my lower stomach started to really hurt.  I got up to use the restroom and I could barely walk.  I was doubled over holding onto the furniture and had tears in my eyes and I told Kyle this isn't normal.  We called the nurses b/c it just kept getting worse.  They were a little perplexed b/c clearly they don't know my pain tolerance, I obviously just had a baby so cramping is normal, etc.  I asked if they could give me something for nausea if I wanted to take the heavy pain meds, so they gave me shot of Phenegran and then some pain medicine.  It dulled the pain but I was still having pain and it was very tender.  I kept telling them, this is my third baby, I know what nursing cramps feel like, that's not what this is, it's not normal.  Kyle and I agreed if the pain meds didn't help enough then we would just give Ella formula for a feeding, to try and keep it from getting worse b/c of nursing cramps.  I remember telling him I didn't even feel like I could lay her on my stomach it hurt so bad.  Well then I started getting a fever off and on.  I had chills and would start shivering, teeth chattering which they said was a side effect from the epidural.  I would get extremely cold and could not get warm, my body would get achey.  Just a bunch of weird things kept happening and it would happen in waves.  I'd feel fine, not great, for a while and then it would hit me - chills, cold, fever, stomach pain.  They decided to give me a very strong antibiotic via IV just to be safe b/c my symptoms were somewhat unusual.  Once I was fever free for 24 hours from the antibiotic and feeling better they released us to go home but told me to keep an eye out for a temperature over 100.4.

We went home and after being home for a day or so the waves of symptoms started again, I could feel it coming, I'd check my temp and it was always borderline.  I'd rest and then it would be better.  My parents and mother in law took the boys to my parents house for a couple nights to try and help me recover b/c they knew I was having a difficult time recovering.  The boys came back Sunday afternoon and by Sunday evening I was back in the hospital with 103.something fever.  When we left the house to go to the hospital my temp was 100.4.  It rose quickly and I was sweating my fever was so hot.  They ran lots of tests in the ER, did some kind of scan where they pumped dye in my veins, did an ultrasound, took my labs, and some other exams.  I had to pump in the hospital and Ella got formula at home.  Once we were admitted, since there was clearly something wrong, Kyle went home and brought Ella and her formula to our room.  I had to pump and dump from the antibiotics and dye in my veins.  We ended up being in the hospital for four days and I was sent home with a PICC line in my arm so I could continue heavy antibiotics.  They ended up thinking I had Endometritis, which is an infection from labor.  They were just very confused by my case b/c I had a quick labor and delivery and everything looked healthy.  To have this bad of an infection, it is usually only seen in a C-section, or extremely long labor.  So it's a mystery.  We are just very grateful that we knew to look out for a fever otherwise things could have gotten bad very quickly.  Thankfully I never felt worse then I did that first night in the hospital, apart from one exam in the ER where the doctor pushed on my left side, that was the most pain I was in.  The Lord was so kind to us and preserved us and protected us.  It was definitely trying emotionally to be separated from my boys, to have to pump dump and bottle feed in the hospital, and it was hard on Kyle being stretched thin between the hospital, home, and caring for me and our family.

The PICC line was very scary to me to do at home so after my 10 days of that was up, I felt like a new woman!  My mom, my mother in law, my dad, and Kyle were incredibly helpful during this whole time!  We/I could not have survived it without them!  My mom's work was very gracious to allow her to continue to care for the boys longer than anticipated and longer than she had taken off, this gave me a HUGE sense of relief.  And my mother in law ended up staying almost a month with us! I love her, she's a wonderful mother in law, not like the ones you see in the movies!  My dad took extra time off of work and came to visit me in the hospital to check on me.  So thankful for my family!

So shortly after I started feeling better Kyle got super sick, he had a really bad case of strep and was the sickest he had been since we've known each other for over 7 or 8 years.  Insane, so I had about a week of caring for all three kids on my own b/c he wasn't allowed to touch them.  Praise the Lord, none of us got strep!  God was so kind in that!  Then as Kyle was recovering I broke a pipe in our kitchen sink, and we had to have a plumber come out, we couldn't use the sink for a couple of days.  I cried on the kitchen floor and told Kyle I could never be Job, from the plumbing problems before Ella until that moment I felt like we couldn't catch a break (even though clearly there were many things the Lord protected us from like having three kids with strep along with daddy).  And then shortly after my mom got SUPER sick and was in the hospital for a week and stayed in the exact same room I was in in the hospital.  I couldn't go see her for several days b/c we didn't know if what she had was contagious.  Sheeweee it was a rough couple of months.

Sorry if you're getting bored at this point, this is mainly for my memory and that's why I'm being so detailed.  Now let me talk about Ella.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE this girl!  I felt an instant bond with her, something I didn't experience with the boys.  We think it's probably b/c we knew her gender, we called her by name, we felt closer to her.  I do definitely prefer knowing the gender as opposed to being surprised at birth.  I felt so protective of Ella, my heart ached the hours I was in the ER away from her.  Oh she is precious!  She is a sweet sweet girl!  She is now almost 4 months old, she is so interactive, she smiles and coos, she thinks she's like 9 months old - putting all her weight on her legs, playing in the exercauser, sitting in the bumbo, and she can roll belly to back.  Ella is just the sweetest little girl in all the world.  She LOVES her daddy, he just looks at her and she lights up, and then if he talks to her she just grins ear to ear and talks right back.  Out of all three she has been the quickest to interact and the most responsive, especially to Kyle.  She is a daddy's girl.  Ella is a big girl, they did sugar checks on her for the first 12 hours of her life b/c of her size.  At her 2 month check up she was 13 lbs something oz and 24 inches long - the 95th percentile!  Kyle hopes she stays big to scare off potential suitors in the future.  She is our quickest to sleep through the night - I think she started sleeping about 10 hours right before her 2 months.  But she does revert back every now and then for an extra feeding really early in the morning but goes right back to sleep.  Her "schedule" I use that word loosely b/c it really changes daily but there's a goal - she's up at 8 eats, goes back down about 1 - 1 1/2 hours later and eats at 11, goes down about 1 1/2-2 hours later, eats at 2 same with the nap, eats at 5 same with nap, eats at 8 no nap, and then again at 9:30 before bed at 10 pm.  We aren't quite sure where her permanent place to sleep is, she sleeps in her bouncy seat in the family room at night but is quickly out growing it.  She loves to be swaddled, praise the Lord for Miracle blankets! My sister Julie is letting us borrow hers and it rocks!  Ella started out sleeping in the bouncy seat b/c she was very refluxy and spit up a lot in the beginning, now she's over that and praise God she was not a fussy reflux baby.  The Lord blessed us with a sweet mannered and well tempered baby girl - He knew what was ahead of us and if she had been a handful it would have made it much more trying.  Okay I think that's plenty for now.  If you read all of this HIGH FIVE!

Mushy Monday - We're about to have another baby!

So Ella is almost here.  Any day now.  Thursday night we celebrated with the boys, enjoying our time as a family of four.  We got KFC, the boys had some caffeine free root beer for the first time, we had DQ Blizzards, and we watched the first Curious George movie.  Every since then Tommy has been signing asking for Curious George the movie (even though he prefers the 2nd movie), and asking for various treats - ice cream, cake, etc.  So funny!  I keep telling him that was a special celebration but he apparently wants to keep celebrating.

Ella's last ultrasound went well, she is now looking like an average size baby, not a giant!  Once again we have no good ultrasound pictures b/c she was literally facing away.  Thanks baby girl.  I am 38 weeks and a couple of days.  The past couple of days I have had significantly more energy, which has been awesome, and I'm trying to put it to good use.  Lots of cleaning and getting things ready for baby girl.  One of the things I love about being pregnant is how a perfect stranger can feel like a genuinely excited friend!  I love the sweet congratulations and joy people have when they ask me questions and find out I'm due soon.  What other time does that happen in life?!  I do think that I will have her some time this week, just b/c that's what I think, but who knows (besides the Lord of course!).

Tom has been trying to talk a lot more.  It's super sweet.  Sometimes we have to quieten him down b/c he gets a little loud.  This is sometimes a challenge for me b/c he doesn't talk like most kids.  He makes a lot of noises and strange sounds but he's trying to talk.  The part that is a challenge for me is when it calls extra attention to him, I'm afraid people will think he isn't "smart" b/c of the sounds he makes.  That sounds weird/stupid that I feel that way but that's just the easiest way to explain it.  Obviously I know he's extremely smart and I can pretty much interpret what he's trying to communicate a good 99% of the time, but others don't know.  And that's the part that's challenging, not to worry what others think, if people know him and are around him they know how smart he is.  I could be over thinking the whole thing.  As he talks more in public it is getting easier and I pray that the Lord would help me to handle any uncomfortable situation with grace and in a way that glorifies him.  I am excited Tom is talking more and wanting to use his voice.  It's funny b/c sometimes he sounds really mad when he's not mad at all - like when you ask him to say please, if he really wants it he basically yells LEASE!! (he leaves out the "p" sound).  He's hilarious, I'm trying to teach him to say things nicely and quietly and he's catching on really quick.  Tommy is still my sweet boy who loves to be snuggled, he is obsessed with TV and would watch it all day long if we let him.  I am excited to see how he responds to baby Ella.

Silas is still quite the handful.  Remember how I said it was getting easier.  Well it all depends on the day.  He's a little spit fire.  He's talking a lot more too, making some hilarious noises and faces when does so.  When he makes the "O" sounds it cracks me up.  This boy knows what he wants and when he wants it and how he wants it and if he doesn't get it he'll make sure you know he's not happy about it.  Shew, he's giving us a run for our money.  Silas is a champion eater though - he pretty much loves a little bit of everything.  He doesn't want just one thing to eat at a meal - he likes a variety.  I do think his love for fruit has helped Tommy eat more fruit which is wonderful.  Silas is very interested in feeding himself which is super nice for me, however he is also very interested in feeding Maggie our dog.  They are a sneaky little team and they spur each other on to disobedience.  Sometimes I have to literally put Maggie in the other room while they eat so she doesn't come and tempt him by standing right next to him and he doesn't lower his hand and tempt her to come over when she's obeying and laying on the other side of the room.  Mischievous.  I know this sweet little boy is going to be quite jealous of Miss Ella, he is always wanting me to hold him when I hold other babies.  However he does hug and kiss the baby dolls he's seen very sweetly, so hopefully that's a good sign!

Kyle started his last semester of school! Hip Hip Hooray!  It doesn't seem real, and hasn't sunk in, but we're both thrilled at the idea of him being finished with school in December!  Wooohooo!

That's all for now, I'm tired and very pregnant ;)

Mushy Monday - Brothers and Sisters

Lots of crazy things happening around here lately.  We had an ultrasound last Thursday when I was right around 32 weeks pregnant and found out Ella is doing great.  She is looking on the bigger side at this point, in the 97th percentile at approximately 5lbs 6oz! Sheesh! I knew she felt large and strong! My doctor isn't concerned b/c she thinks Ella will even out to about the 70th percentile as time goes on, we'll check again when I'm 37 weeks pregnant. Again Ella did not cooperate for any cute pictures, she's camera shy.  The boys never looked that large in ultrasounds but we're thankful she's big and healthy!  Sleeping is getting more difficult, probably b/c she is so big.  She likes to squish my lungs way more than the boys ever did.  We're looking forward to meeting her but we're also thankful for a little more time to prepare for her arrival.  We plan to do something small and fun with the boys before our next ultrasound on August 22nd, just in case she's still ginormous and I have to be induced sooner than anticipated.

A couple of sweet memories I want to capture on here are of Tommy and Silas' growing friendship. Don't get me wrong here, they aren't always best friends or happy to play together, but there are times they really enjoy each other.  The other day Kyle and I saw Tommy chasing Silas through the house, and Tom was chasing Silas the way we chase him (Tommy).  He was going slower intentionally to give Silas a chance to get away and has his arms out wiggling his fingers like he was going to tickle him and going "aaaaaaaah" all the way down the hallway!  Silas was eating it up, giggling and running while to look back to see if his brother was gonna get him! One of the most precious things I have ever seen!  And then just a couple days ago Tom was sitting on the floor and Silas got his sippy cup and backed up and sat down in Tommy's lap.  I asked Tom if he was holding Silas and Tommy wrapped his arms around Silas and held on tight! So stinking cute! Then Silas wanted up right away b/c Tommy was holding too tight. Those brief moments of innocent brotherly love melt my heart! I don't want to make it sound like they don't usually get along, for the most part they really play well together but it's not always those cute "aaawwww" moments, make sense? Hopefully it does.

I've been trying to be intentional to stop and actually look at my boys and just appreciate their little faces.  I'm just amazed at how much Tommy has changed and how handsome he is, I LOVE when he flashes me a cheesy grin!  And Silas is growing up so fast, his baby look is fading into that of a little cute boy! He is learning the same cheesy grin of his brothers and it makes me want to eat him up!  Speaking of Silas I wanted to document that at this age, 14 months, he is getting really good at playing independently, starting to feed himself, and overall is feeling easier to handle (as far as not always needing my attention to be happy).  I don't know if this is the typical age for that or not, but I wanted to remember with Ella that it will get easier!

One last thing, the other night the women from our church got together to celebrate and say goodbye to one of the pastor's wives b/c they are moving away and while it was sad to say goodbye it was such a fun, sweet time with friends.  It had been far too long since I was able to participate in something like that and it made me feel so rejuvenated.  That may sound weird but I actually got to hang out with girl friends, with no kids, when I wasn't exhausted (b/c let's face it, Sunday mornings are exhausting and also consumed by your children so it's no where near the same).  I seriously don't know the last time I enjoyed myself so much.  I went home feeling like I was back in college, haha!  It was wonderful and it reminded me I need to be intentional to do more things like that, I think as a mom sometimes it can feel like you lose some of your personality b/c as smart as my kids are their sense of humor is me making a silly face and chasing them around the house like a monster.  That's fun and I wouldn't change it for the world, but I enjoy being able to laugh with adult friends and have real conversations. It was so fun!  I am very thankful for such sweet sisters in Christ!

Mushy Monday for Christina ;)

So obviously I'm really good at taking time to write blog posts each week.  My cool tatted bff Christina reminded me it had been a while so this is a post written for her.

Speaking of Christina she made sweet Ella a precious tutu! I am seriously soooo excited about having a girl!  Christina made me hair bows, a hair bow board, and now a tutu! I'm thrilled!

Okay so a couple of precious things I want to make sure I document - Silas took his first steps on June 1, 2013 and now as of June 24, 2013 I would say he is officially walking!  He walks more than he crawls.  It has been so fun to see him learn how to walk so quickly, it's a total new experience for us.  With Tommy he took his first steps February 14, 2012 but wasn't really walking until about a week after Silas was born which would have been the end of May 2012.  That's quite a lengthy journey.  And Kyle also got to see Silas' first steps so that was even more fun.  Since Silas is our 2nd kid we also knew some ways to encourage him to walk more, but tried to let him go at his own pace too.  June 1st he took several steps because I tricked him by slipping my fingers out of his hands and then I guess he felt a little betrayed and scared and wouldn't take any more steps for a couple of days.  Silas is a walking champ though!  He can turn completely around standing up, carry heavy toys across the room, and drink from his sippy cup and walk at the same time!  He's got skills!  Silas recently (about a month or so ago) went through a very, very fussy stage - like a 2 week pretty much inconsolable phase.  I was exhausted and sad.  But since then he has returned to himself (it was after his MMRV vaccine and he was teething sheeewweee it was tough) and I am LOVING it/him!  I always, always love him, but I seriously LOVE to enjoy and like being with him!  He has become my little shadow, which most of the time is sweet, and he has turned into quite the snuggler!  Silas is a mama (and nana is also approved) boy, he has specific times when he only wants me, Kyle will not suffice.  Silas makes me laugh, gives precious peck kisses (where he literally is like a bird and will just peck really fast with his mouth closed but lips are not puckered), he walks with his arms out groaning/talking and looks like Frankenstein, he's starting to dance, he just flat melts my heart!  To any moms reading this and not feeling this way about your kid and feeling guilty, please don't think I always feel this way - during those two weeks I was not loving him being a mama's boy, while I knew it wasn't his fault he was acting that way I could not console him in anyway and a person can only listen to so much crying/whining before it starts to wear them down.  But praise God for phases and that these times do not last!  That's what I kept thinking and praying and hoping for - the end of the phase!  I knew it wouldn't be like that forever but in those days it felt like it.  And I sincerely love enjoying my kids!  That and enjoying your husband - nothing better!

On to Tommy boy! My boy is growing up!  Quite literally - he is growing like a weed!  Clothes are getting shorter and shorter on him.  Tom is also my snuggler!  He is starting to make more noises with his mouth and trying to mimic us more and we love to hear him try to talk.  Tommy has become increasingly more interested in playing with Silas but especially now that Silas is walking - Tom totally notices a difference in him.  Silas is apparently much cooler now, who knew?!  One of Tommy's new favorite things to do is to take Kyle's house slippers and put them on his own feet and walk around.  It is adorable (not to mention really good exercise for him b/c his feet are tiny and Kyle's shoes are huge, they're hard for me to walk in).  Anyway it just makes me think of the analogy of how Tommy will want to grow into a man like his daddy, and want to fill his shoes some day.  What a precious site to see two of the skinniest little legs and feet coming from some big old brown house slippers scooting around the kitchen floor.  And to be like his daddy he does have some big shoes to grow into.  Tommy also likes to repeat EVERYTHING Kyle does - if Kyle coughs, Tommy pretends to cough, if Kyle spits out his toothpaste, Tommy pretends to spit out toothpaste,  it Kyle burps, Tommy pretends to burp, if Kyle stretches, Tommy stretches.  It's so stinking funny!  I love it!  We have noticed recently that Tommy is reverting back to some younger behaviors b/c he sees Silas doing it - he's whining more, has taught himself how to fake cry like with tears, and refuses to feed himself when he sees me feeding Silas.  Oy vey!  Oh well we know it's only temporary and while it has/does frustrate me at times it's not worth it, Kyle said once Silas is feeding himself and Tom sees us praising him, he'll start too just b/c he wants our attention.  On a funny note I have noticed there is already a competitive nature in the boys, when it comes to toys but especially our attention.  I want to encourage them not to feel competitive towards each other but I also at times try to use it to my advantage.  Tommy has just recently started hating get his fingernails clipped, he used to be a rock start at it, anyhow I was trying to cut his nails and Silas came up whining at my lap wanting me to hold him.  And I said, "Oh no Silas it's Tommy's turn to get his nails clipped, you can be next."  Tommy completely relaxed and let me cut his nails! Haha!  Oh goodness - these boys are too smart for their own good!  Tommy is such a sweet helper too - he likes to "help" me get up off the floor or couch by pulling me up, he throws things away for me when I ask, and he helps me clean up the toys.  He is a great example for his younger brother and soon to be sister!

Kyle is doing great, we are enjoying him not having any classes since it's summer time.  He only has one class left in the fall and then he is finished - he is getting his Master of Arts in Biblical Counseling.  It has been so nice this pregnancy to feel his support and to not have to explain everything to him all the time.  He's a pro now.  Compared to my pregnancy with Tommy when I would tell him I felt sick or smells bothered me, blah blah blah he'd always question if it was just in my head or if it was really the pregnancy.  Understandably so - I also wondered the same thing a lot of times.  But now he gets it and is so patient.  There are days when I feel way too hormonal and emotional and I hate it.  I cry at the drop of a hat and I just feel unhappy for like a whole day.  And all I have to do is tell him - I feel like my hormones are really out of whack today and I hate it, I know I'm being emotional, I'm sorry, I'm getting on my own nerves.  And he just listens and understands and is patient with me.  I think it helps him too, to know that I don't feel like myself and especially that I don't like the way I'm feeling and sometimes as a result acting.  He's a good man.  He's been building lots of forts with the boys and they love it.  It's funny b/c sometimes I'll come out into the family room and think, "Aw man I just folded that blanket and placed it nicely on the back of the couch." But then I just smile and am so thankful my boys have such a thoughtful and fun dad!  I am happy to fold that blanket ten times a day for them to have that time together. (I don't do that but I would).  I'm looking forward to adding Ella up into this mix!  I need my girl, I am so looking forward to seeing her sweet face and getting to know her individual personality - I love knowing her gender, it has made this pregnancy so different and made me feel so much closer to her.  I love to call her by name and hear the boys say her name.  She'll be here before we know it!  By the way girlfriend has some muscles and stretching skills!  My belly is constantly moving from her kicks and punches and various karate moves. 

For my own memory record - 7 months pregnant is when I really start showing my belly off to the world, when my hips start to get uncomfortable, and when I feel TONS of movement.  The end.

Mushy Monday - Circles of Life

I'm not quite sure where to begin this post. Trying to think where to start has already made me cry. Oh pregnancy hormones. I'll start with what sparked me wanting to write this. The boys and I were dancing in the family room, yet again. And the song, "I want to hold your hand" came on. So we're dancing. I had Silas in my arms and Tommy dancing close by my feet - spinning in circles. And I remembered singing a line of that to my Papaw Daimon many many times. I honestly don't remember when I started singing it to him but I know I sang it a lot after he was in the nursing home. I would like to sit by him and hold his hand and I would sing, "I want to hold your haaaand, I want to hold your hand." And he would usually sing it/say it back to me. That is a precious and dear memory to my heart. So I told the boys as we danced - mommy used to sing this with your Papaw Daimon. These baby boys are already spoiled rotten, I can only imagine how crazy Papaw would have been about them. Granny Jane will say stuff like that a lot - I wish Papaw could see them, he would be so proud, and then she always says but I know he can from heaven. I thought it was pretty great to think about how the song had come full circle and we were making some new sweet memories dancing to it and I liked that it gave me an opportunity to tell them about Papaw Daimon - even if they won't remember it right now.

I love how things like that can take us back to memories and cherished time with our family.

I also want to remember a few things from this past week or so. March 19th, Silas pulled up to standing! He isn't doing it a lot, but he wants to so bad. He's trying to pull up on everything but doesn't quite have the balance. He also has started shaking his head no - he doesn't do it to really say no but it's really funny. He knows the sign "more" and we think he knows "eat" and "all done" - which is kind of crazy b/c we haven't really been trying to teach him. March 21st was World Down Syndrome day and was a sweet and fun day just to be thankful and celebrate people who have a third copy of the 21st chromosome - hence the date 3/21. Silas also turned 10 months old on 3/21, and I FELT THE BABY MOVE! HIP HIP HOORAY! I love it! It was bittersweet thinking this might be the last time I feel my baby's first movement. I am feeling, thinking, and praying about us making this baby the last we have by birth, hopefully to adopt some time in the future. Clearly the Lord may have other plans so I guess we'll go with His! Haha! It's just harder being pregnant with more kids, I want time of not being pregnant or always having a new, sweet baby while they're little, I feel like three and some day four is the amount of attention my mind could focus on and that seem to be the max. I don't want to be spread so thin I can't enjoy and invest in them the way the Lord commands us to and the way I want to.

Tommy and Silas have been playing so much together. They are so sweet. It is however a constant battle trying to teach Tommy not to take E V E R Y toy from Silas. It's driving me a little bonkers, not gonna lie. It's one of those things that it's impossible to police all the time - I can't wash dishes or go down the hall way without hearing Silas cry and coming back to find Tommy standing over him with the toy that was in Silas' hands when I left the room. Sheesh la weesh. Hopefully with time it will get better. If not Tommy's moving out. Haha! NEVER! My boys will always want to live with their mom. Wait, no I don't want creepy mom loving adult men. I want responsible, Godly, wanting to live in the same neighborhood, who cherish and appreciate and love their mom men. :)

By the way may I encourage you to write your spouse a love note this week?! Thank you b/c I'm going to anyway. Make it short, make it long, write it however you want. Just take the time to give them something tangible to see that you appreciate and love them. Encourage them with your words and be sincere don't just try to be romantic. Something that I would write to Kyle may not seem romantic to others but could have deep significance in our relationship - like Kyle bringing me home a bite size candy bar or snack size bag of skittles. That's romance to me baby - one of my favorite forms! I just think love notes are nice, for me it's easier to write out mushy things then to say them and I know I have Kyle's focused attention, as opposed to when I'm talking and there's other things going on or he's not in a serious mood and starts joking around (which I've totally done too.) It also makes you, the writer, slow down and really think about the things that person does that you love, admire, and appreciate. It's nice. It's encouraging. Pray for them too before you write it.

1...2...3

We are having our third little baby! So whenever I find out someone is pregnant I have lots of questions that run through my brain so let's see if I can answer anything you might be wondering.

Yes this baby was a big surprise.

Tommy is 34 months old and Silas is 9 months old. When the new baby comes Tommy will be 3 1/2 and Silas will be 16 months old.

My due date is September 13th, 2013 and I am currently 11 weeks along.

We will be finding out if our little one is a boy or girl this time! Woo - fist time we're ever finding out so this has made me super excited. I am hoping for a girl, Kyle thinks we're having a boy. We should find out mid to end April.

We are very happy and very excited, truly, even though this was not what we had planned. God clearly has a plan for this child's life and we're excited to see what it is.

If the baby is a girl her name will be Ella Christine, if the baby is a boy we have no idea what the name will be. Tommy has suggested Abracadabra.

We do not have a set number of children we'd like to have it honestly I would be A Okay with three little blessings. I say that now but time will tell. And clearly it is not just up to us.

Yes we do know how this keeps happening.

So far family and friends have been super supportive and encouraging when we've shared the news and we are very grateful for that. When I first thought that I might be pregnant I felt a little embarrassed thinking people would think we were being irresponsible. But we know God is in control and His will is better than ours, and we know He says children are a blessing, and we agree!

I have been feeling pretty good, nauseated at times but overall it's been tolerable. I am tired but it seems like I have more energy this pregnancy than I did with Silas. I have started getting the dreaded tension headaches that I got with both boys but warm showers to loosen my neck muscles and caffeine seem to help the most. With Silas Benadryl helped tremendously but not this time around.

I am having a lot more difficulty with food this pregnancy. It's insane. Things that I usually love sound repulsive and I can't eat it. It's becoming difficult, annoying, and wasteful. Something will sound good, I'll make it, take a few bites and I can't eat it. It's gross. This is so sad because I love to eat. I need to eat but sometimes it's so discouraging I wait as long as I possibly can.

I am still nursing Silas. Breast feeding is not birth control. Poster child right here. Yes the doctors and nurses warned me, but what do they know? Haha! I am weaning him now, we're down to one feeling a day and soon I will be finished all together. I'm super pumped about this! (For all you moms out there wondering, I was nursing four times a day when this sweet surprise happened, he was eating baby food too though)

I have no clue where we are going to put this third cold. Our house is perfect for our family of four but will be cramped with five, but that's okay we're blessed to live here for such a good deal ;) right mom and dad?! (They own the house we live in and are very generous landlords. The best I've ever had!)

We will be looking into getting a better minivan, we have a suuuuuuuper used van that is running out of steam and is really only used on occasion.

The boys are really excited. Just kidding, they have no clue what's going on, but if you ask Tommy if he wants to be a big brother again he says "yeah". He also says that if you ask him if he wants a spanking. ;)

I think that about covers it. The end.

Mushy Monday

So I realized the other day that I made Tommy a whole month older than what he actually is, he will be 21 months, this month. I changed the past blog to read 20 months, that way if I read it in the future it will be the real time line. I've been telling all kinds of people he's 21 months but he's actually 20. Oh well. I'm glad he's a month younger than I thought!

My pregnancy so far is going really really smoothly. Praise the Lord! I will be 20 weeks on Tuesday, so I'm halfway there! I can't believe it! We had an ultrasound this past Thursday morning, we did not find out the sex of the baby. And I'm glad we aren't finding out, it is fun this way. But I still kind of want to know. I want to know more with this baby than I did with Tommy! The baby looked beautiful! He/she has really long fingers. They did find one small thing during the ultrasound, it's called a choroid plexus cyst. It's a cyst on the brain, which sounds really bad but it's of no consequence to the brain or the baby's thinking. The cyst is located where the spinal fluid is held and in most babies the cyst disappears but even if it doesn't it will not harm the baby. However, this used to be considered a marker for Down Syndrome and with our history of Tommy having Down Syndrome we will do a special ultrasound to check for any other signs. Our OB does not think that the baby has DS, that's actually one of the reasons they looked at the hands and fingers, to see if they looked shorter (we found that out later). The doctor said she would be shocked if we had another baby with DS and is not concerned about the cyst but it's her job to have it looked into further considering our history. And we actually had planned to have the exact same special ultrasound done for the baby to check out his/her heart b/c of our history and our family history of heart defects. We had the special ultrasound done with Tommy too, and his heart problems didn't show up there. I read a statistic that only 1% of the babies with the cyst end up having DS. So we'll go have the ultrasound done on the 19th of this month, to see if the cyst is still there, and to check out our baby's heart. We are not worried, obviously it is something to think about but we know the Lord is in control and that there's no need to think too much into it until we find out more information.

So this week Tommy's vocabulary has more than doubled, in sign language that is. He now knows 8 signs (and I'm pretty sure this is the order he learned them in) more, daddy, all done, please, dog, eat, mommy, thank you. He also participates in the song, "If you're happy and you know it..." now and he claps his hands, stomps his feet, and pats his head! Tommy is just flourishing and it is such a joy to watch! He has just amazed us with how quickly he is picking up on things and learning to mimic us now. For the longest time he had NO, ZERO, NADA desire to repeat what we were doing, but now he LOVES it, b/c he gets praised when it happens! And he has also developed a little bit of an attitude/temper. When he doesn't get what he wants, especially when eating, he will start to whine/scream/cry. But so far he is responding really well and obeying when I sternly and loudly say, "STOP" and then he stops screaming and I look at him and praisingly say, "GOOD LISTENING!" and he starts smiling and is so proud of himself! I hope he continues to respond well to discipline, as well as responding well to praise! I'd much rather teach him how to behave properly by getting excited over him doing good then having to reprimand him, but I know it's good for him to know boundaries, etc. I do sound like a crazy person though when these times happen - b/c I have to change my tone and sound intentionally stern and then seconds later - smile big and happily say good job! Haha it's pretty funny, but hey it works...for now at least! And when this doesn't work I try to remove him from the situation to distract him, but if either of those don't work we've decided to do time out in his room, but so far we haven't had to do that.

In other news, we are still waiting on cousin Eli to be born! He could be here any day now, and we're all anxiously awaiting for Jeanne's phone call or text to let us know we need to be on our way! We've been able to skype a lot with Aunt Jeanne lately and Tommy loves to stand at the couch and listen and laugh at his aunt! He's been showing off his new signs and song skills!

That's all for now!

It's time for another one...

Another baby that is! Tommy is going to be a big brother in May! We are very excited and look forward to adding another sweet child to our family. I am just at 13 weeks; we had an ultrasound around 8 weeks and everything looked good and I had a belly check last week and the heartbeat was strong. I've been feeling much better than I did when I was pregnant with Tommy, thank the Lord! I do get a lot of headaches when I'm pregnant, but have discovered taking benadryl ASAP helps a lot.  Sometimes the benadryl doesn't quite get it though and my sweet husband rubs my shoulders to help. (Apparently tension headaches are super common for preggo women.)

Tommy has no clue I'm pregnant. He's a very intelligent little guy but that's just beyond his comprehension at this point. We did however use him to announce our pregnancy. We put a fake tattoo on his arm that said "Big Bro" and took a picture of him and sent it out in the mail to our family. Most people were a little suspicious when they saw they had mail from us, b/c we don't usually send out random mail.  It was a fun way to tell them though - on the front of the card it said "Tommy got his first tattoo!" then they opened it to find his picture and a message asking them not to tell anyone but call us when they got it. It was a long day waiting for people to check their mail but also pretty nice not having to make individual phone calls one right after the other. I remember making sooooo many calls when Kyle and I got engaged and when we were pregnant with Tommy - it's a lot of fun but a lot of work. So we took the lazy way out, we let Tommy tell everyone and calls excited calls trickled in through out the day. The first phone call was from my parents b/c Tommy had spent the night with them - the day after we put the tattoo on. Well I tried to get the tattoo off before he went over there but it was a pretty untemporary tatoo - I think he wore it for a good 3 weeks or so. (Side note - we learned rubbing alcohol takes temporary tattoos off nicely) Anyhow, my mom went to give Tommy a bath that morning and found the tatto. At first my parents were confused and then my mom said, "She's pregnant. Call Jill and ask her if she's pregnant!" So my mom and dad called - both on the phone at the same time. And I just laughed it off and said Tommy wanted a tatoo. Then I kept changing the subject - telling them how the dog and cat had both already thrown up that morning - and my mom kept saying, "Are you pregnant?" and my dad would chime in, "You're not answering the question." So finally I told them I was and they were very excited. One of the funniest things is that they thought our friends from church (Christina who I've mentioned in other posts and her husband) did it as a joke for halloween. Anyway it was a lot of fun.  Here's Tommy sporting his tough tattoo:

You would have thought the kid was getting a real tattoo with the fight he put up to hold his arm still for each letter to be blotted on. And once we were finished he pulled his arm back and rubbed the whole thing off, since it was still wet, on his high chair. But it turned out great - he didn't care about it at all once he was able to move his arm freely.

We are so excited and feel so blessed to be adding this new surprise addition to our family.  We weren't planning for this sweet little one but I'm glad that the Lord does things in His timing b/c I had no idea when I'd be ready for another baby. I think it will so much fun for the kids to be close in age and play together and hopefully be close and love each other very much!

I was a little afraid that I wouldn't be as excited this pregnancy, that I would worry that something would be wrong.  Whether it was DS or something else.  And to be honest I was worried in the very beginning, but more about having a miscarriage, not DS.  But I prayed specifically that the Lord would allow me to be excited and joyful and that I wouldn't worry about something being wrong.  And to be completely honest I'm not worried (at least not all right now) about this child having DS.  There is a higher chance once you have one child with DS to have another one, but here's the thing we know what a blessing any child is and that it's something we can handle (not on our own but with the Lord).  We won't be having any special tests done to check for DS, it did change my perspective on them though - I do see where people would choose to have them, not for abortion reasons, but to mentally and medically prepare.  There would definitely have been a perk to having done more research and talked to other moms who had been through it before b/c it's a lot to take in, especially in the hospital when you're having to schedule what seemed like a bajillion doctors appointments and you haven't even taken your child home yet.  But I did some research and Kyle and I talked about it and there's no guarantee with the tests - they can be wrong either way.  The test may say you aren't having a baby with DS and you really are, or that you are and you really aren't.  So I don't see the necessity in putting our emotions through something that may not be accurate. We will have a special ultrasound done on our baby's heart, we had one done with Tommy, b/c heart defects run in our family. They couldn't see any of Tommy's heart defects in utero though, so mainly major ones are apparent. Now if there was a major heart defect connected to DS that shows up in the ultrasound then Kyle and I might reevaluate and have one of the safer tests run, but we'll cross that bridge if we get there.

I do think Tommy will be a great big brother, I don't know if initially he will be but I know he'll grow into one and love this baby so much! My main concern with him right now is learning to be gentle. He likes to hit. We try correcting him, it really has no effect at this point but we're trying to be consistent but at the same time try different things to see if he responds more. But I think he'll be great at sharing his toys and us, he seems to like when we hold other kids as long as we stay close to him too. Oh we won't be finding out if we're having a boy or girl, we didn't with Tommy either. We don't even ask the heart rate at the doctor visits so there are no hints! Kyle thinks we're having a boy! I love that he even made a guess, with Tommy he made no guesses until like a week or two before we had him b/c we did know the heart rate then after being monitored many times b/c of my blood pressure. I'm due at the end of May 2012! We do not have names picked out and Kyle will not talk to me about names. He's not happy with me b/c we did have names picked out from way back when we were pregnant with Tom but those are both very popular names now and I don't like them as much. So he says I'll just change my mind by the end of the pregnancy if we pick out other names (not true...could be true...but probably not). Kyle's never had a love for talking baby names, so I understand his disappointment in me changing my mind, but I have always been a lover of talking about baby names so my fun continues. I have a girl choice picked out but no boy ideas - we want to use all family names if we can. Some day if we talk about and agree on names I'll let you know what they are.

My next doctor's appointment is mid-December and then we have an ultrasound in the beginning of January (where the sex of the baby will NOT be revealed).  And then two or three weeks later we'll have the special heart ultrasound done.

There will be plenty of updates on here. I kind of wish now that I would have blogged while I was pregnant with Tommy so I could go back and read what it was like at this point.

This is my mushy monday post by the way. What's mushier than having a sweet, little, snuggly, hopefully calm and happy and laid back and good sleeping and good eating, baby?!